some people want it all but i just want nothing at all

i dont want to think about relationship, love or boys 

seriously i am tired

im tired of this bullshit

im just going to shut my feelings down i guess

theres no need for me to try

because it seems like bad luck keep hitting at my door

so many scarves hidden in my heart

sometimes all i want to do is let them all out but i know i would be hurting the people i love the most in this world...

i need to sleep. i really hate everything

why do i always fight with my mom

she makes me hate my life

why do i always cry because of her

why can we have a normal mother daughter conversation

sigh im tired, cant feel my eyes

wish i cam forget everything

i need a coma for real, a year of sleep might just help me out..

It just wasnt meant to be....

You know I guess I cant stay on like this anymore. Like I know there a lot of regrets but sometimes a girl just has to move on for her on good because if a guy was really insterested in you well it wouldnt be like this like come on dude it was freking obviously. Do I really need to say it outloud because come on! Even if you are "shy" there are still limits to this shyness... Anyway it's not like I would be hurt forever because I know there are still plenty fishes in the sea. It's okay if you don't want me because maybe I don't want you anymore. I've come to a point that it doesn't matter who it is as along he treats me well and makes me laugh. Those are what I am looking for in a guy. And there are so many of them that do. I feel blessed and lucky. Recently I went out with some girlfriends and him.. One of my last summer crushes lol I mean there were only two. I enjoyed that feeling. He's always on time I mean always 5 minutes early and that's what I really like about him. One of the things that's cool about him is that he used to be so shy but since last summer we got closer by arguing a lot and now we are always teasing each other. I guess that's what I am looking for. A guy I can be best friend with. Teasing him and making fun of him (a little bit) from time to time. 

Life is too short to always worry about stuffs you know. Always be happy and have a smile on my face :)) 

You know it sucked that I couldnt dance with him at prom but it was cute that he danced with his mom. I dont know I guess it's the end of it. I wont let one boy crush me :) if one day theres a chance for us to meet again then it would be great but life is about moving on and looking forward! I guess there are some regrets left behind but ill try to let those regrets break me. 

Love me

finally done with this high school bullshit, surely not going miss it ew

I am doneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee with feelings .
seriously I can't help but just shut down my feelings because they automatically do

Yesterday we finally graduated. One of the most important nights of my life and I have the honor to spend with the people I love. It wasn't easy but we've made it through! Good things always come to an end. I couldn't help myself of crying when we starting clapping our hands to the audience. It was a beautiful and memorable night. Painful for our feet and head but it was all worth it!

My job either makes me really happy or really sad. Today I saw this married couple with their 4 years old daughter and 2 years old baby girl. I still remember them coming to our restaurant as a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship and now they are married and have kids. It just warms my heart to see them. Highlight of my day :) 

I still find him handsome. I still care about him but it doesn't mean I still have feelings for him. You know when it's time move on well it's about time but I will always appreciate the moments we've spent together like he said. I guess I'm starting path since a month ago. I've decided to pursue someone I wasn't sure about my feelings. Since a month, a lot of things have happened. I guess in a way I'm trying to find what I feel about and if if's worth it to fight for this person. Because this person doesn't have the expressions I'm looking for in a guy. Sometimes I think to myself if he's really the one I want to spend days with. I'm not sure but I'm willing to fight until it's time to give up. Sounds cheesy but I liked the fact that my heart skipped a beat when I see. It's like I have a radar that can always detect him. Dancing with him had definetely helped me out and I really liked it.....

cant this be oveeeer? seriously i dont want to go to graduation night, prom night
I JUST WANT TO SLEEEEEP . like for a week at least because I'm really tired
tired of school. dont even feel like partying. I'm just mentally exhausted

i dont get why my family picks a freaking tuesday night to go out and eat korean bbq ESPECIALLY WITHOUT ME LIKEEEEE i'm really sad :'(

Last day of classes

Such a happy and sad moment at the same time. It started as a sucky day but it became sunny when we had to do the "chaine". Anyway this day was amazing. The show for grads was amazing. They did a really good job!!! All of them. I'm going to miss CRA honestly it wasn't that bad. To think back, sec 5 has to be the best year of all of them. I actually feel happy but lazy when I go to school. It wasn't THAT stressful (yes it was) but teachers didn't really make it. Signing the album had been fun and tiring at the same time. I stayed freaking 3 hours to sign the freaking album and I'm not even tanned AND NO MORE WATER AT THE END :( 1h30-4h30 haha :) And the worst part is, I'm not even freaking done. When I came back and start to read the messages, omg it was so touching. I didn't know that I was such a smiley, happy, outgoing, fun person. Thanks to everyone I feel cherished. The messages were either really sweet, cute or really funny. Aww so many great memories spend with those wonderful peopleeeee :) This day is a day to be remembered. CAN'T WAIT FOR GRAD AND PROM!!

Haha my girlfriends are really cute omg. But at the same time I feel bad because they seem more happy than I am about him lol

When your eyes met mine, the world seems to have stopped for a little while

oh cheesy me but it was true

confused

The most overwhelming feeling is not knowing you like/appreciate someone a lot but it's knowing how your friends are willing to fight for your happiness. I am blessed with having them by my side. I especially thank them of everything they've done for me. Of all the screaming haha I know they would be great moms! But also knowing they would cry, laugh and be goofy with me. God had blessed me with those beautiful, kind-hearted ladies. My life is completed. I have already found my true happiness : surrounded by people I love. It's my turn to fight for my other happiness but still..there are still some doubt. I need to know how feels about me. 

<3

aw i want a werewolf boy as well :( omg that movie killed! cant even feel my eyesss :'(

wtf whyyyy people are so suicidal oo whats going on

White guy : do you know what brand it is

dad : i dont know i dont know i dont know

hahaa i love you dad, sometime it just gets me how funny he is

watching the videos and making the montage of my girls and I.. We had so so so much memories together! Can't believe it's almost over. I'm going to miss those moment so much. love them to death

wow how pathetic i look every time i talk to you. it's obvious you're not interrested fuck that  shit how can i not be done after re-reading our conversations.....